If you want ideas for what to text men to will help encourage future opportunities with them, here are a few suggestions.
Use an unexpected response to build their interest:
If you want to capture their attention instantly, text men using some friendly yet intriguing teasing. You want to do this carefully so you don’t sound too flip or overly-friendly. For example, if he texts, “I would treat you well,” you might reply, “I’m not sure that well is good enough,” or, even better, “define ‘well.’”
By responding with something unusual and clever, you are suddenly different and intriguing. Most men will want to explore further if you fuel their interest this way. Unlike most women, you are not typical (read boring). A gentle push back that includes humor will catch his attention.
Your text tells him you’re different and willing to be yourself even at the risk of losing his interest. You are having fun – entertaining yourself and him. You show him that you are friendly and real and trust him to be the same. You don’t fit the mold of many other women who will say whatever they think the guy wants to hear. He’ll love that.
Flirt with Texting:
Be cautious with this approach. You want to sound flirty without coming off as sleazy or easy. For example if they suggest picking you up at your place, you could text men something like, “sounds fine but you don’t get in my home unless my dog approves of you. You might want to bring a biscuit, she’s even fussier than I am.”
One of my female clients, when asking for a guy’s phone number while online dating added: “don’t worry; I wait until after the third date to start stalking ;-).” If you haven’t had a chance to get to know a guy’s sense of humor or style, use an appropriate emoticon to make sure he knows you’re teasing. Be careful not to over use them, however. They can quickly move from kind of cute to really irritating if you use them with every message.
However you respond, think about saying something to make them laugh or smile. When deciding what to text men, remember that men like girls who enjoy laughing and have a good sense of humor. Don’t use humor to insult anyone or in a mean way. That’s an immediate turn-off.
Put a quick stop to aggressive or sexual behavior:
Some men will try texting sexual innuendoes or even overtly-sexual remarks. They think this makes them sound cool or hip and they’re hoping for a positive response. Be prepared to handle this. Here are a few suggestions.
Do not send or accept sexual images while texting. If someone sends you an inappropriate image, you need to respond quickly and clearly. Respond by texting something simple such as:
You definitely have the wrong number,” or “I don’t like these type of texts,” or even, “never send anything like that to me again.” If you are really uncomfortable with the explicit nature of the text or photo, such as a nude image or a shot of certain parts of his anatomy that don’t belong on screen, text that the conversation and the potential for a relationship is over and don’t respond again.
Men who send this type of image, or who request one from you, are likely to send your revealing photos or texts to all of their friends. If you want your intimate photos shared with strangers and friends (going viral), go ahead, but you are not building the foundation for a long-term relationship that way. By responding positively to these sexual overtures you have placed yourself in the “easy” category for him. If you want to be treated seriously, don’t engage in that behavior and don’t allow that behavior to be aimed at you.
It may seem less harmful if you are in a committed relationship, but you are providing fuel for revenge if the two of you ever break-up. Make sure you never send any photos unless you are willing to have them shared with family, friends and strangers on the Internet.
Above all, remember that while you are figuring out what to text men, like dating, texting is only one way to let someone get to know you better. And all the texting is simply the start of a potential relationship, with face-to-face dates and phone conversations. Texting can be flirty, fun and a great way to generate interest, but it’s not enough to create a relationship by itself. Take advantage of its possibilities, but recognize its limitations.
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